Post: Tokyo illomoscope - 10
Date: 2006-07-14.
Tags: busty mecha pilots, illomoscope, japan, travel
Impulse shopper hell has besieged Japan with the evil of vending machines. Metal succubus lurk at every corner to seduce you, abuse you and steal your shiny yen. Expect to spend ~500yen/day servicing whatever addiction you may have, all manners of temptations may be ejected from the metal maiden's frontal slot.
Anime flashbacks. I am constantly having moments where my eyes glaze over and I savour a moment straight from anime. For example the train level crossing sounds are sampled perfectly. The grass hill lined canals are straight out of Furi Kuri. The stone wall sided hill they walk to school in Saikano, beautiful. The forest regions from any of the Ghibli films are there. Misty mountains from Mononoke Hime, check. No kodamas though :( I'm still waiting to see a hillside open and reveal mecha. Lastly of course, schoolgirls.
Any anime otaku has a soft spot for the school uniforms. They're everywhere and cute as can be. I haven't met sailor moon yet, and I haven't seen any cosplay but I've encountered way too much Disney stuff. No doubt they look at Disney the same way we see anime and manga. Suckers, anime has uber developed mecha pilots, and cyborg schoolgirls prone to random acts of insane violence. Anime wins! Also beware the innocent manga/anime stores. The ground floor may look harmless, but ascend the back stairs and you'll find 4-5 levels of panties, smut and tentacles. Both animated and live action. Except the tentacles that is, though we somehow missed a couple of shops. Not a bad thing, just odd.
Maid cafes. Girls who serve you dessert sporting french maid outfits. WTF no wonder this country is so nuts :) So much cuteness concentrated in one spot cannot be safe. It has gathered with evil intentions beyond my ability to discern. I am upon the brink of unravelling the mystery, only to be distracted by maids. DAMN THEM AND THEIR CUTENESS.
We spent a day in Shinjuku at department store 109. It's like shopping at a dance party. 8+ floors of yelling, screaming teenage/20s girls dressed like hookers. If not for the shops I'd believe it was a venus fly trap, luring tourists for organ harvesting. That aside, the never ending bling craze is huge here. Fake diamond sexy belts with buckles big enough to obsure vision are freaking everywhere. Sometimes if you're lucky the belt is sexy enough to include utility compartments. Batman has nothing on these girls. Also, cowboy and pirate looks are in full effect. Noone sporting ninja inspired fashion however. Guess they long ago lost interest in ninja :(
Oh yeah, the plastic sealed used panties rumours are 100% true. Amen country of repressed sexuality. Here are a few photos wandering around tokyo.
A new SI unit has been developed to measure the goodahness of a country. Eli and Pizzy dubbed it the illometre. The illometer is measurable upon a Rude Goldberg type device known as an Illomoscope. This odd contraption calculates a weighted average of jaw droppedness, eye poppedness, wang elevation and smile width. The illomoscope worked like a charm until we arrived at Akihabara in Tokyo. I fucking love this country. If you are partial, in any way, to any of the following then Tokyo will have you busting sequential nuts (blow off valve optional):
Impulse shopper hell has besieged Japan with the evil of vending machines. Metal succubus lurk at every corner to seduce you, abuse you and steal your shiny yen. Expect to spend ~500yen/day servicing whatever addiction you may have, all manners of temptations may be ejected from the metal maiden's frontal slot.
Anime flashbacks. I am constantly having moments where my eyes glaze over and I savour a moment straight from anime. For example the train level crossing sounds are sampled perfectly. The grass hill lined canals are straight out of Furi Kuri. The stone wall sided hill they walk to school in Saikano, beautiful. The forest regions from any of the Ghibli films are there. Misty mountains from Mononoke Hime, check. No kodamas though :( I'm still waiting to see a hillside open and reveal mecha. Lastly of course, schoolgirls.
Any anime otaku has a soft spot for the school uniforms. They're everywhere and cute as can be. I haven't met sailor moon yet, and I haven't seen any cosplay but I've encountered way too much Disney stuff. No doubt they look at Disney the same way we see anime and manga. Suckers, anime has uber developed mecha pilots, and cyborg schoolgirls prone to random acts of insane violence. Anime wins! Also beware the innocent manga/anime stores. The ground floor may look harmless, but ascend the back stairs and you'll find 4-5 levels of panties, smut and tentacles. Both animated and live action. Except the tentacles that is, though we somehow missed a couple of shops. Not a bad thing, just odd.
Maid cafes. Girls who serve you dessert sporting french maid outfits. WTF no wonder this country is so nuts :) So much cuteness concentrated in one spot cannot be safe. It has gathered with evil intentions beyond my ability to discern. I am upon the brink of unravelling the mystery, only to be distracted by maids. DAMN THEM AND THEIR CUTENESS.
We spent a day in Shinjuku at department store 109. It's like shopping at a dance party. 8+ floors of yelling, screaming teenage/20s girls dressed like hookers. If not for the shops I'd believe it was a venus fly trap, luring tourists for organ harvesting. That aside, the never ending bling craze is huge here. Fake diamond sexy belts with buckles big enough to obsure vision are freaking everywhere. Sometimes if you're lucky the belt is sexy enough to include utility compartments. Batman has nothing on these girls. Also, cowboy and pirate looks are in full effect. Noone sporting ninja inspired fashion however. Guess they long ago lost interest in ninja :(
Oh yeah, the plastic sealed used panties rumours are 100% true. Amen country of repressed sexuality. Here are a few photos wandering around tokyo.
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