Date: 2009-07-10.
Tags: climbing, france, monument, paris, srt
So while all and sundry went aptly about their job, content in the knowledge all was right with the world, qx, rocco, rex and I clambered skywards out of sight, out of mind and if I do say so myself, feeling pretty fucking good about ourselves. Were we too noobish to make that assessment reliably? It was too early to tell and drifting further from our minds, for we were on the lower roof of Paris' Panthéon.
The first stones were laid in 1758, which to gain proper perspective, was a dozen years before ol' mate Captain James Cook the pied piper of convicts led us evil-doers across the seas and founded a great land on beaches, bbqs and walkinshaw commodores. The Panth is an old impressive building used to store old important dead people. Voltaire, Victor Hugo, Émile Zola, Marie Curie and a bunch of other hardhitters who are evidently more famous than myself because many have their own wiki pages and are interred in a giant pimping building in the 5ème. If I devise a reliable method of self-interment I'll write a cURL script to posthumous update the wikipedia page to include moi. The interior is swathed in homogenous religious art, pay 8 eurobucks for the luxury of a daylight looksee if that's your thing. Ours however was further skyward.
Powered by hot ovalitine ((ovomaltine in france) do yourself a favour and make it with milk else it tastes undeniably of dirt) we ventured upwards, past the clock those guys repaired and right up into the little observation hall on top. As you're likely aware Paris is pretty well flat and the panth is on a small hill so we could see forever, surveying the skyline ticking off the same items from the ZOMGEPIC checklist the tourists do. However I take pride in our nocturnal forays because I firmly believe travel nurtures the spirit greater when one interacts with the places they visit. Hanging from, then pulling down upon one's head, a piece of 200+ year old limestone drainage pipe while desperately trying to untangle a rope is, if nothing else, interaction. That's a story for another time but one indicative of the way these things tend to occur.
pic: twinky-z
Emblazoned across le Panth's imposing facade is the phrase "AUX GRANDS HOMMES LA PATRIE RECONNAISSANTE" - "to the great men, [love and kisses] the grateful homeland", along with a series of carved statues. The most prominent of these is an enormous female statue right in the centre with a halo of stars and a wreath in each hand. It was love at first sight, I would have her. As I slid down the rope, dangling from a 9mm shoestring, face to enormous face with her it was pretty well obvious I'd not be satisfying her in any way, unless she might need to floss her teeth.
click to upsize your win, photo twinky-z
We'd had this idea we could leave a memento of our passing, a vaguely amusing easter egg clandestinely planted into every tourist photo of le panth on flickr. Having blown all our cash on rope and hardware there was nothing left to spend on the easter egg so an old Australian high school tie was sacrificed to the cause. Next time we'll scrounge an oro-stimulator. Going first twinky-z discovered not only was her neck melded into the backdrop, her face is as wide as your arm is long. Regardless the tie was affixed, photos were snapped (for the Alzheimers album and to taunt the "pics or it didn't happen" haters) and moments after hitting the ground a van of les flics hustled right on by, ignorant or indifferent to the 2 guys standing around in front of a national monument in harnesses with cameras... just another night in the capital. Good work lads, how right they were.
click to upsize your win, photo twinky-z
One can capitalise upon the human trait, where those unskilled at something lack the ability to objectively assess their level of skill at said something so tend to overestimate their ability for it. Naturally to any seccas reading this give yourselves a pat on the back, give your dog a bone to chew while you kick back and take a deserve. Don't believe for a second what this site may suggest. It's all photoshop.
So while all and sundry went aptly about their job, content in the knowledge all was right with the world, qx, rocco, rex and I clambered skywards out of sight, out of mind and if I do say so myself, feeling pretty fucking good about ourselves. Were we too noobish to make that assessment reliably? It was too early to tell and drifting further from our minds, for we were on the lower roof of Paris' Panthéon.
The first stones were laid in 1758, which to gain proper perspective, was a dozen years before ol' mate Captain James Cook the pied piper of convicts led us evil-doers across the seas and founded a great land on beaches, bbqs and walkinshaw commodores. The Panth is an old impressive building used to store old important dead people. Voltaire, Victor Hugo, Émile Zola, Marie Curie and a bunch of other hardhitters who are evidently more famous than myself because many have their own wiki pages and are interred in a giant pimping building in the 5ème. If I devise a reliable method of self-interment I'll write a cURL script to posthumous update the wikipedia page to include moi. The interior is swathed in homogenous religious art, pay 8 eurobucks for the luxury of a daylight looksee if that's your thing. Ours however was further skyward.
Powered by hot ovalitine ((ovomaltine in france) do yourself a favour and make it with milk else it tastes undeniably of dirt) we ventured upwards, past the clock those guys repaired and right up into the little observation hall on top. As you're likely aware Paris is pretty well flat and the panth is on a small hill so we could see forever, surveying the skyline ticking off the same items from the ZOMGEPIC checklist the tourists do. However I take pride in our nocturnal forays because I firmly believe travel nurtures the spirit greater when one interacts with the places they visit. Hanging from, then pulling down upon one's head, a piece of 200+ year old limestone drainage pipe while desperately trying to untangle a rope is, if nothing else, interaction. That's a story for another time but one indicative of the way these things tend to occur.
pic: twinky-z
Emblazoned across le Panth's imposing facade is the phrase "AUX GRANDS HOMMES LA PATRIE RECONNAISSANTE" - "to the great men, [love and kisses] the grateful homeland", along with a series of carved statues. The most prominent of these is an enormous female statue right in the centre with a halo of stars and a wreath in each hand. It was love at first sight, I would have her. As I slid down the rope, dangling from a 9mm shoestring, face to enormous face with her it was pretty well obvious I'd not be satisfying her in any way, unless she might need to floss her teeth.
click to upsize your win, photo twinky-z We'd had this idea we could leave a memento of our passing, a vaguely amusing easter egg clandestinely planted into every tourist photo of le panth on flickr. Having blown all our cash on rope and hardware there was nothing left to spend on the easter egg so an old Australian high school tie was sacrificed to the cause. Next time we'll scrounge an oro-stimulator. Going first twinky-z discovered not only was her neck melded into the backdrop, her face is as wide as your arm is long. Regardless the tie was affixed, photos were snapped (for the Alzheimers album and to taunt the "pics or it didn't happen" haters) and moments after hitting the ground a van of les flics hustled right on by, ignorant or indifferent to the 2 guys standing around in front of a national monument in harnesses with cameras... just another night in the capital. Good work lads, how right they were.
click to upsize your win, photo twinky-z 
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16 Comment(s)
Go back to hitting your wife and beating your children you fucking hater.
2010-03-06 07:26
#2
dsankt
Very niiice rude boy!
But seeriouslee, its Walkinshaw Commodore... y'know, with capital letters... in fact, VL, Walkinshaw Commodore, complete with one of Brockies 'energy polarisers', running on 22psi tyres, just to piss off motoring journos :D
But seeriouslee, its Walkinshaw Commodore... y'know, with capital letters... in fact, VL, Walkinshaw Commodore, complete with one of Brockies 'energy polarisers', running on 22psi tyres, just to piss off motoring journos :D
I'm with qx, definitely a photoshop, I can see the pixels.
but on an SRS BSNS note. Fucking Sickcunt. I could write a long winded comment, but i'll stick with, "cool pics", as i'm saving those long comments for Urban Exploration Forums.
but on an SRS BSNS note. Fucking Sickcunt. I could write a long winded comment, but i'll stick with, "cool pics", as i'm saving those long comments for Urban Exploration Forums.
Plus the thing keeps changing colour in all the photos. I'm calling fake aswell. Plus I saw the size and ferocity of the dog firsthand, and there's no way you got past that, meaty steak decoy or otherwise.
Disappointing, guys. Very disappointing.
Disappointing, guys. Very disappointing.
Oh I can the feel the jealousy, the envy is tangible. I wish I could bottle it up somehow... but then what's the point. That shit is rampant. RAMPANT I TELL YOU.
2010-03-06 07:27
#6
dsankt
In the last photo, did the people in the lower left corner see you up there? Were they part of your exploration team?
Nah, just some drunken onlookers. Le panth is like that, a popular drinking spot for randoms on a nice paris evening.
2010-03-06 07:27
#8
dsankt
Why even explore anymore, the standards are just becoming too high. Ye Gads!@
Sooo sick! That last shot is just great, I think I frightened the other people in this house when I yelled "fuck yes" out loud when I clicked it.
Keep it up man, you're a role model to some of us. :D
Keep it up man, you're a role model to some of us. :D
i don't honestly know how the hell youse guys pulled that one off. mad props, as always, for doing ridiculous things and making my American cojones feel that much smaller.
come climb our state capitol dome; instead of getting beaned by limestone pipes, you'll be grabbin' some 24k bling bling.
come climb our state capitol dome; instead of getting beaned by limestone pipes, you'll be grabbin' some 24k bling bling.
Then getting shot down by some paranoid citizen packing heat.
2010-03-06 07:29
#12
dsankt
Yes! A new post, at last! Thanks for the fix.
Ohhh shit, madZ0r stuff peeps!
Another epic journey upwards.
Definitely need you in a cape for some of these missions.
Beautiful photos also. I can't believe how huuuge it it, so thankyou for clearing it up with that one particular photo.
Definitely need you in a cape for some of these missions.
Beautiful photos also. I can't believe how huuuge it it, so thankyou for clearing it up with that one particular photo.
You sir are a cheeky bastard!
[generic 'epic post' phrase]
GLORYYY
fucking epic, as usual.
Keep up the good work man
Keep up the good work man
Should be calling out qx for the selective desaturation!
We tried that already, he beat the lie detector and got the job :-/
2010-03-06 07:30
#21
dsankt
This is a complete photoshop job. You can tell its a fake because the shadow's are all wrong.
This is exactly like that scene in the movie Never Back Down where Max applied for work at the LAPD, and thought he aced the drug test and the psyc exam. When he found he was rejected he got upset and went out partying, and then the next day found he was rejected by the cops because homeland security wanted him. He ended up having to beat a drug screening and a lie detector, and finally got the job.