Date: 2008-09-25.
Tags: jockups, london, sewers, tyburn, uk, westbourne
photo: Sgt Marshall
As the invites dictated suits were donned, jackets buttoned and waders shined. Proudly dressed in our thrift-store finest 7 of us boarded The Tube and began the journey into central London. Tube commuters are unflappable at the best of times, presented with a band of rowdy half drunk drainers in their sunday best is clearly not one of those times. We skipped from carriage to carriage plying out wit and charm at whoever would listen, and twice as hard at those who attempted to ignore us and our pumped up packages. None more so than qx, who dressed in a gaudy black, yellow and red jacket topped with a precariously balanced beret looked much like a sewer minstrel. One classy lass so overcome by his bulging man-hammer declared in less than hushed tones "cor, look at the size of his plodger". Suffer bitches, Harold has given us a wonderbra. It's fine though, once the roey kicks in there will be no time to wonder where that plodger went but you'll know for sure in the morning.
photo: Otter
At Knightsbridge tube, a very expensive part of London, we sauntered towards Hyde Park to meet our fellows and begin a trek that would lead us across systems and into the Lower Tyburn passing below some very famous London landmarks. JD arrived minus his droogies, pupils the size of pennies, pants hoisted by suspenders. Siologen's sports jacket was offset by purple nylon paints, accented with shit stains. Perfect sewer attire. Our merry band now numbered 8. From the Westbourne to The Egg and finally to The Tyburn we marched, a blurry conga line of singing and chanting booming down the tunnel in drunken revelry.
photo: Little Mike
Near the large flap separating upper and lower Tyburn we encountered the other group comprising Alias, Otter (cowboy), DDT, Little Mike (monocle!), Ian (dracula) and the Vicar. United at least we popped the flap and hustled downstream into the final chamber Otter had brilliantly prepared earlier with tealight candles and a large sign "International Drain Meet 2008". Perfect.
photo: Little Mike
Stories flowed to match the alcohol and celebrate a giant year in drainer culture. The UK is on fire with masses of exploration by Little Mike, DDT and The Vicar of the Northern Draining Alliance, relative newcomers Snappel and Userscott have hit the ground running and the southerner are blazing a trail as JD bursts out of retirement to begin a solid push into Wales. The stage is set to usher in a mammoth year of British drainery and culverteering with a dash of Australian contribution. Bazalgette's bastard son Siologen Jeeves Westminster III has returned. Raise your glasses gentleman because this is what it looks like.
"Unfortunately, I've not even gotten a passport to replace my expired one, so I'll have to pass.", Harold replied. Leatheroaks, worldwide authority on all things rubbery and jockupable, would not be joining us but united by a love for the Fresh, 15 hardy drain explorers descended upon London for the most ambitious Drain Meet yet.
photo: Sgt Marshall
As the invites dictated suits were donned, jackets buttoned and waders shined. Proudly dressed in our thrift-store finest 7 of us boarded The Tube and began the journey into central London. Tube commuters are unflappable at the best of times, presented with a band of rowdy half drunk drainers in their sunday best is clearly not one of those times. We skipped from carriage to carriage plying out wit and charm at whoever would listen, and twice as hard at those who attempted to ignore us and our pumped up packages. None more so than qx, who dressed in a gaudy black, yellow and red jacket topped with a precariously balanced beret looked much like a sewer minstrel. One classy lass so overcome by his bulging man-hammer declared in less than hushed tones "cor, look at the size of his plodger". Suffer bitches, Harold has given us a wonderbra. It's fine though, once the roey kicks in there will be no time to wonder where that plodger went but you'll know for sure in the morning.
photo: Otter
At Knightsbridge tube, a very expensive part of London, we sauntered towards Hyde Park to meet our fellows and begin a trek that would lead us across systems and into the Lower Tyburn passing below some very famous London landmarks. JD arrived minus his droogies, pupils the size of pennies, pants hoisted by suspenders. Siologen's sports jacket was offset by purple nylon paints, accented with shit stains. Perfect sewer attire. Our merry band now numbered 8. From the Westbourne to The Egg and finally to The Tyburn we marched, a blurry conga line of singing and chanting booming down the tunnel in drunken revelry.
photo: Little Mike
Near the large flap separating upper and lower Tyburn we encountered the other group comprising Alias, Otter (cowboy), DDT, Little Mike (monocle!), Ian (dracula) and the Vicar. United at least we popped the flap and hustled downstream into the final chamber Otter had brilliantly prepared earlier with tealight candles and a large sign "International Drain Meet 2008". Perfect.
photo: Little Mike
Stories flowed to match the alcohol and celebrate a giant year in drainer culture. The UK is on fire with masses of exploration by Little Mike, DDT and The Vicar of the Northern Draining Alliance, relative newcomers Snappel and Userscott have hit the ground running and the southerner are blazing a trail as JD bursts out of retirement to begin a solid push into Wales. The stage is set to usher in a mammoth year of British drainery and culverteering with a dash of Australian contribution. Bazalgette's bastard son Siologen Jeeves Westminster III has returned. Raise your glasses gentleman because this is what it looks like.
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11 Comment(s)
What a sausage fest! What happened to Gremlin and Dirge, were they not up for the debauchery?
Dirge was in France, Gremlin in Egypt. They'd have been overwhelmed by the jockupage so probably for the best.
An awesome night fo' sho! And the fun continued on the night bus back to Bethal Green, and then there was that wader lobbing contest with some foreign chicks and then it went blurry...
I'd see that girl while I was playing basketball in Teh Wick, walking with a different guy everytime, in these tiny little shorts and just assumed she was a russian prostitute since she had an eastern euro look about her. Who'd have thought she'd be such a proficient wader tosser? I heard scott has a video of the bus ride back and me rambling on about shoreditch twats in front of people, to be fair, were fucking shoreditch twats...
I still like JD's hat.
drains and stuffed crotches, how could the london chicks stay away?
ha ha ha
Ill shunn, ill. :D
What an incredible night nuff said bring on 2009.....
Shame I couldn't make it. If you'll be around this summer, though, I'm planning on coming out. And I expect big drayyyyyyyynes.
We'll be doing an explorer exchange then. I'm planning on being back in the states. Still the London mob will be active and drain god siolo will be living there.
bring fluros and resell